Bloopers!

(Reader’s discretion recommended.. Strictly above 18)

Have anyone of u, ever thought, what makes ur life really INTERESTING. Taking a week off from ur work? Earning lot of bucks? Going on a long drive with ur honey? Family get-together? Friends reunion? Getting an A in the exam.. Surely Naah! Well, if noticed, I carefully used the word “Interesting”, instead of “Happy” for which all of the above questions hold an affirmative answer. Well I hate to admit but it’s The BLOOPERS. It has a complete package of Action, Drama, Suspense, Romance, Thrill and above all “THE MOMENT” which u will cherish for the lifetime. Personally I believe, life, when complicated, is great fun. Don’t u believe me? I will make you. For Sure.

Everyone does have a past marinated with few embarrassing moments, the so called Bloopers. I too had my share of “The Moments” in this short life. Still I get Goosebumps whenever I recollect any of those. I believe, it’s the biggest blessing given by GOD to the mankind that you tend to forget the bad things happened to you. But everything comes with a price and so you also tend to forget good things happened to you, that too even faster. But few things/moments stamps a blueprint forever. Hereby, am opening the hidden files/folders straight from my heart…

Age 17

Working parents and individual bungalow leaves room for a great deal of experiments.. hehe.. A Teenager, I was then, always engrossed in some kinda mischief. Highly influenced by English movies, I was very fascinated by one thing. How these Americans comfortably sleep naked (even if they are alone).. hehehahaha.. Am sure this thought must have crossed many of u also. So once I thought of giving it a shot during the daytime when there won’t be anyone at home. Carefully closed all the doors and there I was “An American on the Bed”.. hehe.. And then “The moment” came. Hardly ever I dreamed of , our maid servant who was working for us, for last 20 years, also having the keys to our house, unlocked the front door leaving it wide open. Already I was naked, a sudden cold gripped me. My room was next to the main entrance hall and within a sec she was around the corner with a broomstick in her hand. Though was having a biiiiiig blanket over me, my mind refused to accept that it was not transparent. Trying to bug myself in, from every corner I was horrified. Hardly I had buried myself inside the blanket, she calmly asked me to step out of the room as she wanted to clean around. By this time I was actually wobbling inside. Refusing to wake up I laid down in utter shame. An inner voice said.. “Alankar these 6 minutes, u will be remembering for coming 60 years of your life.”

Family..

Common Now! Everyone surfs PORN. That’s a unsaid fact. Have u ever given a thought why every time the remote fails to work automatically, when F TV turns on while changing the channels on the set and there you are watching that with ur grandparents, striking the remote as hard as you could. That’s what we call bad timing. Run time Bloopers. Hehe.. Anyways I was in my room, watching the “Unfulfilled Desires”(as I call it) on my Laptop. Suddenly out of nowhere my dad came in the room and stood behind me. Now there’s a simple option of ALT-TAB in computer which shifts the window screens. I had done that before and was pretty confident of doing that this time also. But it was destined to be the day which I would remember years later also and so by mistake I pressed ALT-TAB twice. Because of this the screen changed for 1 sec and again the original screen came up. Caught red-handed!!!! Dad stood there for 3 sec max. and left the room.. hehehe.. Worst encounter ever.. From then I changed the name to “Undesired, but fulfilled”.

Relationship..

It was my last day in Nagpur, before joining Patni Computers Systems, Mumbai. After today we wont be able to meet for 4 months was our concern. Wanted to spend the whole day with her, I decided to take her to our farmhouse, a beautiful place 20 km out of Nagpur. We have workers employed as caretakers there but hardly I was worried about that as DAD used to go once in 6 months for a routine checkup. We went there , spent the whole day talking with each other, enjoying the Nature and returned with wet eyes. Goodness gracious sakes alive! Dad went there the very next day. How cruel is this coincidence, I thought. As expected till then, the workers told dad “Chote saab were here yesterday only. That too with a girl”. F**K. Next day at breakfast Dad asked me “By any chance you happened to go to our farmhouse as harilal was saying he saw u yest. He remember ur green bike”. I started stammering. There was no chance of me accepting that and so refused that straight away. Made few fake calls to friends asking have anyone of them gone there as many of my friends have already visited that place with me. Mom came up with an horrifying idea of all of us going together to farm house and asking harilal to identify whether it was me only or some other boy. On that evening itself , I with one friend went back to farmhouse without telling at home. Harilal stays somewhere near farmhouse in 5 km diameter and so almost in dark we searched his home in the nearby village. Told him the entire story and asked him not to identify myself, tomorrow when all of us will be back here with mom dad. He agreed and backstabbed. Also he told mom dad that last night Chote saab were here to turn the game around. Mom didn’t talk to me for a month 

Verbal..

Many a times what u speak is far away from what u intend to. Few days back I almost lost my job for saying something like that. Though people (along with my boss) laughed out as if I made that up intentionally. It was Client Presentation in which we had to present the proposal. It was me who was bestowed with the responsibility of presentation. It’s a project on grid computing for which I am working on Molecular Organisms (Bioinformatics) part. So the presentation was very well going on till I said something and made the disaster. In place of saying Molecular Organisms I said Molecular “Orgasm”. And there they were, crying out with pleasure, giving justice to the word I used.. hahahaha..


Patni Computers Systems…

She and me were really good friends. We joined the organization on the same day and from there itself we had a great chemistry together. We always used to flirt a bit though no hard feelings and all, but pure friendship. Almost used to do everything together. From work to lunch…
We were in the lift, only two of us, going from 4th floor to ground floor. I thought of playing around. She was at the very back of the long elongated lift we had. I was somewhere near the door. I don’t remember exactly but some flirting was going on and I placed my hands on the opposite side(walls) of the lift. Now the situation was like… She’s at the very back end. Am near the door with my hands at the side, facing her as if saying “Now were will u go.. something imaginary” hehe.. we were just fooling around and suddenly the lift door opened at 3rd floor. Someone must have pressed for the lift on 3rd floor and the doors slide wide open. Around 4 of them including few senior faces in the building were standing watching my back as I was facing towards her. In a moment everyone including her, burst out in laughter and I was melting. Never used a lift after that day…

Many more similar days/events came making this hell of an interesting life. Cant even think of few, writing down is way too far. So crux of the blog is no matter how bad days u have seen try to find out happiness in those times also. Laugh at yourself. If you cant, I will do it for you.. hehehe.

Today’s Mantra : Screw your life a bit and start living.

She’s my Friend. My Chat Friend

Hey guys.. how r u all.. hope u all doing great and were eagerly waiting for my next write up. Well am a big Aamir Khan fan and so go with 1 blog per year strategy.. lol.. Anyways after the long list of comments i received on my first blog i was moreover pressurized than happy for the criticism i would receive for my next blog if its not gonna match the expectations. But then i thought there's always an option to delete the comments u hate, which became my ultimate source of inspiration..:)
Now the question was “THE TOPIC”. My Target audience has always been the Youth and Today's Youth are totally into 3 things:-
1.Love 2.MTV ROADIES and 3.Chatting...

Now Love, NO WAY.. i have screwed mine big time... and i know it wont sell.
MTV roadies is followed by everyone and would be a very debatable topic but I don’t want people fighting for their favorite Roadies in my comments and So finally i decided its gonna be...

This post is dedicated to Mr.Orkut Buyukkokten
One amongst those, who had a vision.

Few Days back..

It was 1.30 in the night. Raining, as heavily as it could. Temperature below zero. A perfect weather to sleep tight in your cozy blankets; but there i was, standing in the balcony, shredding tears. Few days back i had a break up with my life. It was, what i thought, a life long relationship but u know life f***s u every time you take things granted. I always use to laugh at people for doing crazy stuffs in break ups. I saw myself doing few. I never understood how can any guy cry until i did so. Yeaaah!!! Its painful and it sucks. That too when you are seven seas apart. Anyways wont take you all in that filthy reality. For starting a relationship Orkut has served many as a catalyst. With more than 800 friends and 12000 scraps am a proud Orkut'ian.....

Next morning or afternoon you can say, as i haven’t seen a Saturday "Morning" after coming to USA.:),deprived of last night's sleep, woke up reluctantly, had some Maggi and slept again. My roommate woke me up at 7 in the evening as it was my cooking turn.:( Am a true Epicurean(devoted to sensual pleasures like food)and so love to try out different recipes. Made very unhealthy Unda Curry. Any amount is always less, when u live with two other guys..now with some stack filled , i opened my web home page.. www.Orkut.com .Excellent speed and 24 hrs free Net is one of the things i really appreciate about USA. We almost live here online. Read newspapers online, watch live cricket streaming, watch almost all fav. Indian Movies/Tele serials, buy electronic gadgets.. ORDER DOMINOS PIZZA.. everything. So orkut window popped up with few new scraps, few NICE faces in profile visitors, and with the Today’s Fortune “You are going to find someone special today”. My memory won the race and recollected a similar line read 2 yrs back.. The day i met her for whom today i shred. Every single memory rejuvenated.

2 years back...

It was the day of smiles. Hardly met thrice, we were in love as never been before. Every moment with her was like a millennium. Hardly there was any coffee shop we didn’t explored, any restaurant’s we didn’t dine, any temple we didn’t bowed, any movie we didn’t see together... Suddenly the friend circle doubled. I started living.

Every morning used to start with a “Good morning message”(never forwarded) and night used to end when the mobile used to get discharged. Oh those nights! Every guy who has been in love will agree with me on this that you love the girl even more when she starts feeling sleepy.. :) Every movie seen with her was required to be seen for the second time if you really want to know the story.. hehe.. Exam time support, even if you don’t know a single word from her subjects. Sharing the pre exam pressure and enjoying the post exam happiness. Career holds, forced to separate in distance but strengthened the attraction for each other. With a promise to live in hearts together, we departed. They say, for getting something u always lose something but something so precious...

Today...

She was not online. Every night (USA time zone) she comes online around 11 and it was already 11.05 pm. Every 5 sec I was opening gtalk window and was getting more impatient. The long list am having in my gtalk always feels incomplete without her name. Hardly ever I realized, I was getting addicted..

I haven’t met her. I haven’t seen her. I haven’t heard her. Its her words while we chat and her Testimonials. That’s the only way I know her. Some text. She’s from the city I was born in so initially did thought of having something in common. Though later I discovered she’s my female version. Astonishing it is, to see someone who is sooooo like you. They say there are 128 universe and in each one there’s one identical to you but I am so lucky to find one here itself. I was always good with words. But she’s better. I was proud of my Sanskar’s until I was introduced to her. Used to take great honor having those many testimonials on orkut until I read her’s. Friends who know me really well say my love for my family can be clearly seen but I know her for less than a month and have already felt the same passion within her. Once I asked what’s ur obsession? I have seen people answering that question being as selfish as they could, but what she replied changed my outlook towards her. She said “My ultimate dream in life is to see my parents happy till the end.” Some inner voice of mine said “Amen”...

A girl who loves cricket. Discusses IPL matches with me. I Bet her statistics are more updated than most of the so called, cricket lovers. Proudly wearing the crown of “Miss PJ queen” she sends a smiley with every sentence she types. Girls really rule the ART OF GOSSIPING, she’s no less. Bargaining is her most enjoyable moment of shopping. Dreams limited but efforts unlimited. Being the youngest in the family loved by one and all. Enthusiast of the extreme kind. Member of “People who Live to eat” fraternity. Our every topic, however serious it might be, ends on foodstuffs. Very Cutely call herself “Sabhya”(innocent) when it comes to boys. One can actually feel every time talking in person while chatting with her, even if the two are 100000 miles apart.

I know all of you, who are still with me till this point including her, must be feeling that am madly in love with her. For me surely it’s a NO! I don’t blame you guys but it’s the stereotype thinking which makes it looks like that. Why its difficult to believe that some people CAN BE JUST FRIENDS? I feel its something even bigger than that. Very pure. No pretentions. I can chat with her being ME which is the ONLY THING that inspires me to wait for her to come online. I accept somewhere down the line “THE Thought” comes but her next sent Smiley takes it Off and I enjoy the sanity of the unsaid/unknown relationship with her. Because of her I feel am a good person since to meet someone so pure you must be one of “HIS” favorites. Today I don’t have a girlfriend but I have a girl Friend.
She’s my friend. My chat friend.